


Nowhere

by generaldisdain



Category: Frozen (Disney Movies)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-14
Updated: 2019-12-14
Packaged: 2021-02-26 05:34:22
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,637
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21788344
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/generaldisdain/pseuds/generaldisdain
Summary: Based on a Tumblr post by @thesvenqueen: "a fic where Anna finally just get’s it all out; the pain, the frustration, the anger, the hurt she has felt for so long and bottled up for the sake of her sister and everyone else around her. I want her to fucking let it all go and just SCREAM"Anna feels like she has to hold all of her pain inside. Kristoff helps her learn that it's okay to let it all out and that sometimes, healing can be found in the middle of nowhere.
Relationships: Anna & Kristoff (Disney), Anna/Kristoff (Disney)
Comments: 12
Kudos: 100





	Nowhere

Arendelle’s castle kitchen was bustling with life. It was dark throughout the kingdom, but lanterns overhead bathed the room in a warm glow. Queen Anna was diligently working with the kitchen staff in preparation for an upcoming ball. The staff always assured her that she didn’t need to stay after hours to help with preparations, but Anna loved planning parties and events. Crafting bouquets, stringing up lights, watching the staff roll in chocolate fountains—it was all so magical. When the castle was alive with music and laughter, that was when Anna felt most alive.

“Your majesty, we still need one more dessert item to prepare.” The head chef handed Anna a little box stuffed with recipes. The recipes had been accumulating over the years, and now the box was practically overflowing. Anna nodded with delight. Desserts were her favorite, and she was eager to pick one that she hadn’t tried yet for the ball.

Recipes for triple-layer chocolate cakes, truffles, and macaroons all made Anna’s mouth water, but one recipe made her fall silent. Anna was bubbly and talkative. She was not one to fall into contemplative silence, but the recipe she held in her trembling hands stole her breath away.

It was a recipe for a lemon pound cake, nothing too spectacular, but scrawled along the top of the worn paper were the words “Anna’s favorite”. The cursive was so neat, yet natural, the words followed by a hastily drawn heart. The words were written by her mother. Anna stayed there, frozen, as the staff continued to bustle around her.

Anna had come to learn that grief came in waves. Some days you’re wading through the shallows of the ocean, gentle waves lapping at your ankles. On others, the ocean swells and churns and swallows you whole.

“Is this the one you’ve picked?” the chef questioned, clearly not noticing the beginnings of tears in Anna’s eyes.

Anna cleared her throat and straightened her back. “No, no,” she replied in her cheerful voice. “You can make this one.” She handed him a fine-looking chocolate cake recipe from the box. Normally a suggestion of this kind would be followed by a flurry of thank you’s and other words of appreciation, but this time, Anna promptly excused herself for the night and slipped out of the kitchen.

It had been 6 years, but sometimes it still felt so raw.

Anna walked down the hall at a brisk pace, hot tears making their way down her cheeks. She walked faster as she felt them start to tumble, unable to keep the darkness of loss from creeping around her throat. She just needed to wash up and get to bed and then she would be fine. It would be best not to worry anyone. She quietly closed the door behind her and collapsed onto her bed.

Unbeknownst to her, Kristoff had been turning the corner just in time to notice his fiancé enter her chamber in a hurry.

“Anna?” Kristoff peaked his head through the slightly open door. When he didn’t hear a response, he pushed the door open and slowly walked inside, assessing the situation. Anna was curled up on her bed in a heap, clutching a pillow to her chest and crying in broken, ragged sobs that sent pain straight through his heart. Kristoff made his way over to the bed and sat down.

“I’m fine,” she sniffed.

Kristoff almost rolled his eyes at the absurdity of the lie.

Anna was a brilliant Queen. She did her job with such passion, kindness, and grace. Kristoff was constantly in awe of her. But ever since she accepted her new role, he had noticed a change in her. It was as if the woods had awoken something in her, something that made her duck her gaze at dinner parties and excuse herself for a spell, only to return dabbing at her eyes with a handkerchief. Maybe it was the grief that resurfaced with learning more about the deaths of her parents or the lingering terror of temporarily losing Elsa and Olaf. Or perhaps it was the betrayal she still felt (although he knew she would never admit it out loud) when Elsa had kept secrets from her and sent her away to journey into Ahtohallan on her own. Maybe it was a bit of all three. But whatever it was, Kristoff saw that it had changed her. And with her new role as Queen, she had a kingdom counting on her. She wasn’t exactly able to process everything that had happened. It broke Kristoff’s heart.

“Anna,” he started. She shifted slightly at his voice. “Talk to me.”

“I’m fine, really, I just,” she spoke into the pillow, pausing to take in a shallow breath. “I’m just tired. I’ll be okay in the morning.”

“Come here,” he whispered, laying down on the bed and opening his arms. Anna glanced up and made her way towards him, snuggling into his chest and inhaling deeply. 

They cuddled in silence for a bit, Kristoff’s hand trancing up and down her arm and Anna’s breathing catching in her throat every so often. But soon, Kristoff shifted his body so that he was seated at the edge of the bed, poised to get up. Anna let out a soft whine at the sudden loss of contact.

“Come on, I want to take you somewhere.”

Anna looked up at him, long tendrils of red hair falling in front of her tear-blotched face. “What?”

Kristoff didn’t answer. He placed a lingering kiss on her forehead. “Come on, Anna,” he hummed, taking her hand and leading her out of her room and down the hall. His heart ached for her. Kristoff hated to see her like this, hated to see how she felt she had to hide her feelings and keep up appearances as the Queen. He was going to do something about it.

“We’re heading out.” The guards posted at the front entrance of the castle shared a curious look at Kristoff’s statement. Nevertheless, they both nodded solemnly at the gruff man before them, Queen in tow. Anna hid her face from their wandering eyes. Gossip traveled quickly, rippling through the castle staff’s lips, and she wanted to avoid any word getting out about her current state.

Face still hidden, she mustered up enough strength in her voice to let out a convincingly commanding “I won’t be gone long” to the guards.

Kristoff placed a gentle hand on the small of his Queen’s back, guiding her down a sloping walkway outside of the castle to the stables. He smiled as he opened the door. The light from the moon and the street lamps cast a soft glow into the stable, illuminating his beloved Sven.

Sven’s eyes opened just a hair, but he immediately perked up when he noticed Kristoff. Kristoff motioned to Anna, still sullen and quiet in his arms, and Sven simmered down a bit, always the empathetic and perceptive companion.

After getting the eager Sven into his reins and attached to his sleigh, Kristoff helped Anna clamor up into the sleigh’s body. Her huddled figure looked so small and frail. He was almost afraid she would break in his arms. He brought a gentle hand to her face.

“We don’t have to go if you don’t want to.”

“No, I want to. I trust you, Kristoff.”

His heart surged with her words, and he placed another gentle kiss on her forehead. With that, they were off.

They rode in silence, the evening wind howling around them as Sven raced their sleigh across the fiord. Anna didn’t know where he was taking her, but she knew that if she stayed back at the castle she would drown in the weight of her own emotions. She wasn’t sure what she was feeling, but it was bad—dark and cold and angry, located in some sort of cauldron deep inside of her. Wherever this cauldron was, it was getting close to bubbling over and spilling onto the floor. She had done such a good job of holding it all together. She hated herself for feeling so much, so strongly, and all at once, for being the cause of that pained and determined expression on Kristoff’s face. She had worried him.

Just as she thought she might drown, the sleigh came to a halt.

Kristoff offered her a small smile. “We’re here.”

Anna strained her eyes against the darkness. “Where is here?”

“Nowhere.”

“What?” Anna gazed at her fiancé with a look of confusion, but Kristoff just smiled and took her hand once more, leading her out of the sleigh and into the barren field before them.

“We’re in the middle of nowhere.” He looked almost giddy now, a wide smile breaking out onto his face, and Anna felt her heart soar despite the storm raging inside of her. They had stopped in a forest clearing at least a few miles from the nearest village or path. The grass was glowing in the moonlight, little drops of dew sparkling like fallen stars. Trees towered above them and cast shadows into the clearing, but the light of the moon was enough for Anna to see her fiance’s face and her breath in front of her coming out in puffs of condensation. 

Kristoff grabbed her arms and brought them up and out, opening her to the wind and the darkness. His chest was pressed against her back and Anna felt warmth and light creep up through her body. Her breathing fell to match the rhythm of his, in and out, in and out. She felt it everywhere, tickling her neck, pressing up against her back. 

“Anna, I want you to scream.”

Anna answered him with a question. “Kristoff, what are you talking about?”

He brought his cheek to hers, nestling his chin onto her shoulder and speaking gently to her. “We’re in the middle of nowhere.” Anna gazed out at the barren fiord as he continued. “Everything you’re feeling, just scream, yell, let it out. I don’t want you to bottle anything in anymore. Give it to the wind, Anna.”  
Kristoff took a step back, letting Anna catch her breath and stand on her own. He waited patiently, letting her take in his words and gather up everything so that she could throw it back out to the world.

She inhaled deeply, breathing in the cool air of the night. Anna was spunky and feisty, yes, but it wasn’t often she let any of her more negative emotions out. She let excitement, tranquility, and happiness consume her often, leaving her collapsing into fits of giggles. Seldom did she let grief or anger creep through her cracks around her sister or subjects. The only one who caught glimpses of what lay beneath it all was Kristoff, and even then, she rarely allowed herself to succumb to anything that showed weakness or would worry those around her. She was a Queen. And falling apart was the one luxury a Queen could not afford.  
And yet, here she was. Kristoff behind her, waiting and watching her from a slight distance. The world was silent save for Sven’s gentle hooves pawing at the earth. With only her beloved around, Anna was not a Queen. She was just Anna. Queen Anna begged to go back to the palace, bury everything deep within herself, get a good night’s rest, and begin tomorrow anew. But Anna wanted to scream.

She let out a soft yell at first, self-consciousness eating away at her.

Kristoff bolted ahead of her, planted his feet in a spot near the edge of the clearing, threw his head back, and let out a scream. Sven’s ears flew back and Anna let out a startled squeak that grew into a soft laugh. 

“There’s nobody out here, Anna!” he yelled, running back to her. He took her hands into his. “It’s just us.” Suddenly he was dancing around, running and yelling, beckoning for Anna to join him.

Anna laughed harder and ran after Kristoff. She let the anger and pain of it all rise up in her stomach and tumble out of her mouth and into the air. The wind caught her cry and sent it somewhere far away. She clenched her fists and screamed into the ground. She stomped and kicked and let frustration fly from her fingertips, moving in a way that was reminiscent of Elsa freezing the lands before her. She felt like a child throwing a tantrum, but instead of a stern, disapproving glare from a parent, Kristoff was there. He was smiling, coaxing the pain and hurt out of her and drawing it into the night sky. They yelled and danced, an odd combination, but one that dragged the darkness out of Anna's throat and replaced it with warmth and air and the freshness of a nighttime breeze. She screamed until her voice was hoarse, and she collapsed into bouts of sobs followed quickly by laughter, the kind of emotion that can only come after a release.

Kristoff joined her on the ground and brought a steady hand to her back.

Anna sat up and hugged her knees close to her. She was suddenly shivering from the cold, or maybe it was the adrenaline.

Kristoff brought her a blanket from the sleigh and draped it around her shoulders.

“It just hurts so much sometimes,” she choked out.

Kristoff nodded and rubbed her back, silently willing her to continue.

“I lost so many years of my life waiting for something, anything, from my sister, or, or my parents. Or anyone. They died and I was still in the dark. And then she was hearing that voice, and oh god, she couldn’t even tell me. I had to grieve all by myself. And when Elsa was grieving with me I was always strong for her. I know she didn’t ask me to be, but I was. I’m tired of being strong all the time.” Anna’s voice gave out into a gentle sob and Kristoff pulled her in, strong arms wrapping around her shaking frame.

“You don’t have to be strong all the time, Anna. It’s okay to feel these things. It’s okay to be mad at what you’ve lost and the sacrifices you’ve made.” Kristoff closed his eyes and inhaled deeply, breathing her in, his fiancé, his beautiful Anna. She had been through so much, and he would give her the world if he could.  
They stayed like that for a while, Anna shaking and crying against Kristoff’s chest, Kristoff rocking the two of them to the gentle rhythm of the night sky. But soon the cries gave way to staggered breathing which then gave way to regular inhales and exhales. Anna reached up a tentative hand and touched Kristoff’s face, reveling in the roughness of his stubble and the warmth of his skin. It was him. She was safe and loved. So incredibly loved.

“Thank you,” she said, unsure if those words would ever be enough to properly thank Kristoff for all that he’d given her and done for her, for how he’d made her the happiest girl in the world.

He ruffled her hair in response. “Come on,” he started, getting up and brushing off the legs of his pants. “Let’s get you home.”

Anna took his hand as she stood and gave it a squeeze. "I'm with you, Kristoff. I already am home."

"I love you so much," he whispered, lips pressed lovingly to the top of her head in a gentle kiss.

"I love you too."

Kristoff guided Anna back up into the sleigh. With a command given to Sven, the couple rode off into the dead of night, back towards the light of the castle and the kingdom, Anna's head resting against Kristoff's strong frame. They were both home.

**Author's Note:**

> I saw Frozen 2 and I can't stop thinking about how cute Kristoff and Anna are,,,,, I'm soft.
> 
> I'm @generaldisdainn on Tumblr! Give me a follow on there if you'd like- it's slowly becoming a Kristanna blog lol,,,,,


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